You were riding by in one of your fanciest carriages. The people behind marveled in how slow your horse was, but you took all the time in the world to reach your destination. Although no one complained, you and your face made everyone so angry that there simply isn't anything nice to say about you. Get a fitter horse next time, and remember that you are not the center of attention.

 

Sincerely

Someone who isn't missing you but who is pissing on your memory